Somebody commented on Twitter tonight that adopters can never fully understand an adoptees loss. I agree, never fully, but I do understand a lot of it because Jazz talks to me. We have been nothing if not honest to each other from the start. Maybe its her personality or maybe the result of us together, but hiding feelings has never been our thing. Now she is adult and we still talk honestly warts and all.
She has made sure I understand her loss and her sadness and her anger at what life dealt her with no choice. She also communicates her gain, her happiness and her joy “despite” being adopted by me.
Jazz is not somebody who will not be heard and nobody owns her.


4 thoughts on “Understanding

  1. I so gree , I cannot ever understand totally my girls pain , but believe me they have always been allowed to express their feelings and we told them everything at appropriate ages ,never mind how dark and seedy it may have been . Honesty in adoption is vital .The girls never hide the fact they wish things have been different and neither do I . We all wish we had been born together from the beginning but we weren’t , working together to heal old wounds is constant work , WORDS ! And understanding. great post , Great picture .

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